I Don't Have A Title Today
Eulogy by Ofri Bibas Levy - Yarden's Sister and Aunt to Ariel and Kfir:
“I've been writing these words in my mind for over a year. The uncertainty, anxiety, and concern for you gave my thoughts no rest, but each time my mind began to formulate them, I forcefully pushed the words away—with the power of my love for you and Yarden, with the strength of hope that you would return. And now I stand here before you. This is not how I hoped to meet you again.
How does one begin to say goodbye? For sixteen months, I've been speaking about you everywhere. It always hurt and intensified the longing, but talking about you also kept you present, alive. How can it be that you are no longer here? Shiri, how can it be that we won't schedule another Saturday picnic? That we won't melt with joy seeing Ariel run to Toam for hugs and kisses? That we won't make fun of Yarden and worry about him together? That you won't pass on advice and hand-me-downs from Kfir to Afik, whom you never got to meet? How did they take a whole year of shared experiences and memories from us? How can we imagine a future without you? How did they take you from us? Sixteen months since that terrible Saturday, and nothing makes sense yet—nothing feels real, and everything still lacks logic.
Shiri, you were the perfect partner for Yarden. I couldn't have asked for anyone better for him. Loving, sensitive, caring, nurturing, calming. The strength you instilled in him all these years, we now draw through him. Don't worry about him. He is strong and amazing and still makes us laugh. And we will take care of him. I promise. Luli, how I miss you. To your shyness, your mischievousness, your sweetness, your smile. Seeing you with your Toto. How much she misses you. How much we imagined you growing up together, far into a post-army trip to South America. Kfir, there will never be consolation for not having more time with you. We didn't get to do anything together. I didn't even get to buy you a gift for your first birthday. I will always remember you; you will never be forgotten. You are in my head and heart every time I look at Toam, Negev, and Afik. Every time I see a Batman costume or hear a baby laugh. And that's how I want to remember the three of you—happy, laughing, a family. Many people ask for your forgiveness, and Yarden's, and ours. But the blame is not on them.
This disaster should not have happened. You should not have been taken, and you should have returned alive. Forgiveness means accepting responsibility and committing to act differently, to learn from mistakes. There is no meaning to forgiveness before the failures are investigated, and all officials take responsibility. Our disaster as a nation and as a family should not have happened, and must never happen again. They could have saved you but preferred revenge. We lost. Our image of triumph will never happen. Our struggle against the enemies will be eternal, but we must always sanctify life, love of fellow humans, respect for the dead, and never leave anyone behind. Otherwise, we lose who we are. Luli and Firfir, the world came to know you in the most tragic way, but I promise we will do everything so that your memory will be one of innocence, love, and goodness. Exactly as mom Shiri and dad Yarden raised you. I promise to do good in your name. Love and miss you forever.”
As an American… which is the only thing I legally am, I beg to differ gently with Ofri, here: “They could have saved you but preferred revenge.”
I don’t think Israel could have saved Shiri, Ariel, and Kfir.
But I think the president could have.
We don’t have the power we had before Vietnam, but the American president still has a lot of power, as Trump is demonstrating (sometimes).
What an American president really wants, he gets.
I will go to my grave believing that if Biden had said, “Cough up those hostages, you motherfuckers,” it would have happened.
There are so many levers of power at his disposal: through UNRWA, through Qatar, many. Dry up their money, arrest their leaders, and miracles happen.
But he didn’t. In fact, he used the crisis to pressure Israel. The poor hostages became hapless footballs, tossed between a superpower run by a corrupt president in political trouble at home and abroad (Ukraine), and a demagogue eager to cover up his own failures.
The hostages never had a chance. The ones released in November were just lucky. It was all for show.
If Biden had cared, he would have gotten the hostages out.
I will go to my grave believing this.